I had lunch yesterday with my youngest Bro..He has lived with aspergers his whole life. He has always been a blessing in my life.
During my mother's journey with addiction I became her substitute as my brothers are much younger than I.
My Bro always struggled with school,friends etc due to his disease.He isolated himself,could not cope with people,relationships or social situations but was super smart.One of my first hand views of this was at his grade 2 parent(sister)-teacher interviews.The teacher informed me he was Lazy..did nothing in school..showed me his work books..empty pages.I found this hard to digest as he was extremely smart and had a VERY high IQ.
I told her I thought he was very smart & needed to be challenged...If he found something too easy he just did not bother with it..perhaps she could give him something more challenging and see where that takes us.She did..He thrived academically.He graduated from university with honors.Unfortunately he could not work in his chosen field due to the social limitations his aspergers placed on him.
He lived with my parents his whole life until my dad died a few years ago.My son was in danger of dying from his disease at this time and I worried about what was going to happen to my bro.I offered to let him come live us.He declined.He was scared of my son,wanted nothing to do with him.I had to respect his decision.
My middle bro and I had encouraged him when Dad was first diagnosed with cancer to find a job.He needed to be able to look after himself..seek counselling..life skills..he did.
He now lives on his own in a small apartment,works nights,which suits him to a T,And enjoys his solitude.
He has broadened my horizons so much.If he is not interested in your conversation..he just leaves..walks away..does not matter who it is..where it is..off he goes.So I figured out quite early to communicate with him on a more intimate level.. I had to be interesting to him.That was a challenge..As I mentioned above he is extremely smart..I am so so..he made me broaden my horizons..step out of MY comfort zone..He loves Books..BIG books..DEEP books..I had to be able to read these books and understand in order to converse with him about them. His Music tastes..again out of my comfort zone..But I managed to find a few I loved.
He is also an Artist of pen & paints.He always amazes me with his penned stories & Art pieces.He has brought alot of Joy into my life.
I have been so consumed with my son and his addiction ,I had let my brother down, by not seeing him as much.Lunch was wonderful..we caught up on what he was reading,the movies he had seen,his latest Art..My heart soared.I missed our talks..I missed reading those BIG books about subjects I can't even pronounce..But I learned :)..I missed my Bro..One of the blessings I had let slide during this Journey with addiction..Love ya Bro..xoxo