Monday, February 24, 2014

Signs Of The Times

As I still continue to wrestle with my gut,I was thinking back on signs we missed..and signs that were in our face and could easily be explained & believed by lies & manipulation.If, as a parent you see any of these signs..keep vigilant..keep talking to your child..get help!! It can escalate very quickly!!
1. Neglected appearance/hygiene..This never happened to our son until he was in deep deep trouble..He was always neat in appearance..a fanatic about cleanliness..So much so we couldn't keep Q-tips in the house..That would be a Big sign..no Q-tips!! Used for filters when cooking their choice of opiate on a spoon to prevent pieces from clogging the syringe.
2.Violent outbursts at home..This was nothing new to us..the ADHD brings & brought these episodes on at home when he was frustrated..overwhelmed..
3. Frequent use of Eye drops
4. Drug Paraphernalia ...As parents we can be a bit slow at this identification, with the ones that are not so obvious..straws..who doesn't have straws in their house..but you find them everywhere..cut in half..Same goes for pens..with the guts missing..household items used for snorting their drugs..Q-tip frenzy..Spoon loss..this took on a life of it's own in our house As the good silver ones disappeared first..you know the ones in a chest..never used..until one day I decided to set a fancy table with my bestest china and silverware..minus 36 spoons..12 of each size..HELLO!!!
5. Skin abrasions..usually on their face..but again can be easily explained away by your Child
6. Hostility towards family members..Jekyll & Hyde behavior..Again something we were used to and easily explained away by the ADHD
7.Glossy eyes                                                                                           8.Valuables Missing..as a fellow blogger stated so eloquently " An Alcoholic may steal your purse but an Addict will steal it and help you look for it!! That is more powerful than you think..because it is so true..just speaks to the cunningness of this disease!!
9. Possessing unexplained valuables...easily explained..I borrowed it from Johnny.
10. Stealing/borrowing money
11.Change in friends
12. Depression
13. Withdrawal
14.Reckless Behavior
15. Defiles Family Values..Our son still possessed all the family values he was taught..he would quote them when talking about someone else whose behavior was void of them..they just did not apply to him anymore!!
16. Disrespectful to parents
17. Lying/Deception
18. Sneaky behavior
19. Disregards Consequences
20. Loss of Interest in healthy activities
21. Verbally abusive
22. Manipulative/Self-Centered..There is no more family..just getting what they want to get that next fix..and it can be relentless until they get what they want!!
23. Lack of Motivation
24.My hubby just reminded of this one,  had us baffled for awhile..the perfect circle indentation on all his cards..credit..health..license..right in the middle of all his cards..it popped up..like it was used for hammering a nail..and the head of nail remained indented on the card...Nope..that would be the impression left when the card was used for crushing the pill.
 One of these signs alone does not an addict make..But when you combine a few..a half a dozen..a dozen..Your in BIG trouble..Try talking to them first..sometimes..they know they are in trouble..and are relieved the secret is out..and alot of times it is too late and denial denial denial..Time for YOU to get help..reach out..talk about it..see a professional..your family doctor..but do not keep this secret inside thinking it will go away..It won't..Don't keep it a secret because you are scared of what others will think..Addiction thrives on secrecy !! You will lose friends..family members..but the mission here is to save your child!! Not your family's reputation..It can & has happened to anyone!! Educate yourself on addiction..join support groups..seek parents going through the same..No Parent should have to live through this nightmare..alone.Do Not enable your Addict..this takes time to perfect..don't be too hard on yourself if you slip..But don't do anything for them they cant do for themselves..But do Advocate for them..you have to remember their brains stopped growing when that first high handcuffed them..They may be 20..24..26..but mentally they are still 16..17..18..Give them support & love..but do not give in to the Addiction..It is difficult to find proper help for them..what works for one..does not work for everyone.Fell free to add any signs that applied to your situation..each journey is unique , as it is Horrific.

None of these signs are evident at the moment in our house..but my Gut is still churning overtime!! xoxo 




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