Friday, January 10, 2014

The Battle Within

The article I am linking to is an excellent article on the benefits of and medications for, those who struggle with addictions.My reason for writing about this today is two-fold.

The first reason and it is just my thoughts & inner turmoil with my son on methadone.I just can't seem to let the fears about using an opiate to treat an opiate addiction.My fear is and has always been his using while on methadone,which is one of the reasons he was dropped from a previous methadone program.I have seen first hand the effects of using while on this program..he near died from overdose..I have also seen the horrendous side effects of coming off the methadone safely,impossible, unless you take it very slowly over a long period of time,even years.Of course active addiction in itself is scary and carry's with it the reality of death due to overdose or a slow death due to years of using on the body.It is for me a question of pick your poison.My optimistic side tells me the methadone will keep him alive until he decides enough is enough and gives him a chance at a normal life..which is where he is now,I am ever so grateful for that second chance.He is closely monitored,blood work,P tests,and healthy heart checks.So why do I still struggle about this course of treatment ???

This is the second reason , yesterday, my son lost another friend,who was on the methadone program and died in his sleep.A young father of 2 children who wanted nothing more than to turn his life around and provide a great life for his children.The why's are not important,what is important is that ADDICTION stole another of our young!!! It is such a horrid disease and I hate it so dam much!! It is indeed a war..and all's fair in war..So you use all the weapons available in fighting it! Because in the end..if you don't..Addiction will win.
In Cancer we do the same,we use a host of potent chemicals that could possibly kill us..or cure us..and time & time again we chose the chemicals..even if it means just an extra 2 weeks,2 months,2 years.

Prevention and education and talking and telling our stories is our only hope for our children who are NOT in the nasty grips of addiction but at that vulnerable age of perhaps just thinking it might be cool to try..just once.

 Our lives are and will be forever changed by addiction..for us and many many family's we have to go on living..or addiction wins..we do it one day at a time,one hour at a time,or one minute at a time.We continue to fight and educate ourselves and pay it forward...xo


  1. I too have struggled with the fact that my addicted loved one needs meds to stop using, suboxone, I had wished that he could stop without it but he really did need the help and has been clean for over a year. From what I have been reading lately the choice of treatment right now, well they are saying the most effective treatment is medication and therapy. Gosh, I can so relate to your last paragraph, we have to keep paying it forward.

    1. Congrats!! 1 year ! Good for him..& you :)
      Thanks for sharing,my son is 3 months clean..everyday remains a struggle,however I am beginning to notice many positive changes just in the last few weeks.The important is he!! xo