Wednesday, February 26, 2014

I Simply Asked

After a week of wondering if he using again and all the inner turmoil,questions,fears and silent innuendo's I decided to simply,calmly ask...
Are you in Trouble ?
 Son : No..I have had a few slips..I won't lie..The cravings sometimes are horrendous..and I gave in..BUT..I remember you saying to me the day I came out of detox.."Never forget where you came from..You don't ever want to go back..We never want you to go back"..And I got back on track.

"I" have done things differently this time.Given his recovery over to him..and taken control over my own. I could have saved myself a week of hell by asking him that simple question earlier..but I wanted him to own it..Well he did..But I forgot to remind myself, "I" was still his Mamma.So Mamma did what Mamma's do and asked ! And I got an honest answer..a first..a sign..a good step in the right direction.

When he was younger and the ADHD would get to the point he was literally hanging from the chandeliers, I would take him him out for a walk..a run..a swim..a skate..anything to eat up that extra energy..So I encouraged him yesterday to get a gym membership..just a 3 month one..to have a place to go to eat up those thoughts..work things out..take his anger..frustrations..feelings..cravings..out on the equipment. He may meet new healthy friends..he may get back in shape physically..We will see..

But for today my gut has settled..simply by asking..we become so hardened by all the lies and manipulation we have lived with through this battle of their
Addiction..we get conditioned that everything they say is a lie..I asked..I actually got an honest answer..xoxo


2 comments:

  1. An honest answer is great! Better to know the truth. I love it when they remember our advice. :)

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    Replies
    1. Amazing how such a simple gesture can bring us so much peace!!
      All those little steps can add up..although slowly..It means he is still in the race!! xoxo

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